Prompt #3

Today's prompt is to write a letter to your younger self, pre-trauma. What would you say to yourself? What advice do you think you needed back then?

Dear JoLynn at 6,

Please know that you will get through this. You are stronger than you think. Your resilience is astounding. Know that it wasn't your fault and you did nothing wrong. The road will be bumpy, but the destination will be worth it.

Even though there will be people who won't believe you, all the important people will believe and support you. Your truth is still your truth. Speak it!

You are not alone. Reach out for help. Don't hold the pain in. It only makes it scarier. It only makes it easier to overwhelm and consume you. The pain is only temporary.....don't let it delude you to finding a permanent way out. God has different plans for you.

You are destined to help others like you. To hold their pain and light their darkness. Your passion will become guiding others on their healing journeys. You will survive, I promise. And you will help others survive.

With lots of love,

JoLynn at 41

What does your younger self need to hear?

Prompt #2

Today's prompt is to write a letter to someone who has caused you harm. It can be your perpetrator, but it doesn't have to be. It can be someone you disclosed to that didn't believe you. It can be someone who minimized your experience or victim-blamed. 

You don't have to send the letter -- it can be sent, kept inside your journal, or burned in a ritual. The important thing is getting out what you want/need to say.

Dear grandfather,

You stole my childhood. My earliest memory is of the abuse. Not of comfort and care, bur hurt and pain. My childhood was about secrets and shame. At first I didn't understand what was going on. By the time I did it was hard to see a way out. It took all I had to disclose. Once the secret was out I had to deal with the breakup of my family. The guilt was crippling. I blamed myself for a long time. You took so much from me - my family, my power, my trust, my sense of self. For years I didn't want to live. I didn't think I deserved to live. Everyone's motives were suspect -- I trusted no one. Triggers sent me spiraling. I felt simultaneously numb and over-sensitive.  

But I am no longer a child. You no longer have control over me. No more tears will be shed because of you. I am learning to trust again. Now I know how I want and deserve to be treated, and I will stand for nothing less. As an advocate, I help others on their own journeys; shining light into their darkness. I take pride in who I am -- my sense of self is back. I am beautiful at the broken places.

To whom do you have something to say?

Prompt #1

Our first prompt is to write about our happy/safe space. It can be real or imagined. Describe it in as much detail as possible. Where is it? What is the weather like? What sounds do you hear? What do you do? Who is there with you? How does this place make you feel? 


* I do this as my first prompt with clients, because I feel it is important as you are processing the trauma that you have a safe space to go to (real or virtual) when things get overwhelming. This helps to make that space concrete.


My happy place is near a body of water. Listening to the babbling of a brook or the crashing of waves in the ocean steadies my heartbeat. The tension is released, and I am able to relax and let go. I would lay in a comfortable hammock with the breeze gentling cooling me and read. With the birds singing softly in the background, I would escape into the story.

I would be alone, nobody to distract or interrupt. No one to have to explain myself to. No one to tell me I am "healing wrong." I would take comfort in the solitude. The only living creature besides the birds would be a cat nuzzling at my side, its purrs soothing my anxious body.

As I read, I would slowly drift into an easy slumber; my mind letting go of the hurt and the pain.



Where is your happy place?

About Me & this Blog

My name is JoLynn, and I am a survivor of sexual violence. From the age of 6 until I disclosed at age 12, I was repeatedly abused by my paternal grandfather. I have lost count of the number of times I have encountered catcalls, groping, and other forms of street harassment.

Unfortunately, my story is not unique. I know there are probably millions more like me. I am now an advocate, giving voice to those who have lost theirs. My solace has been in journaling, and  I bring that to the survivors I work with. I want to offer this to others with this blog. Each week I will add a journaling prompt and my response. I will also be periodically adding resources, coping strategies, and book/documentary reviews.

You can write your own response to the prompt and keep it to yourself or share it in the comments. Or you can just reflect without writing. It's up to you.

I hope you enjoy taking this journey with me! 💗💗💗💗